Outnumbered Two to One

I always hated tag growing up. But then again, I also hated hide-and-seek, dodge-ball, kick ball, soft ball, and volley ball. Pretty much anything that had ball in the name, mostly because I had the worst hand eye coordination ever, and mostly said orbitals always seemed to gravitate toward my head rather than my hands, so that I was almost always cringing and dodging and squeezing my eyes shut when I should have been watching the ball, but I digress.

In the past couple of weeks, I’ve been tagged with some memes (still not entirely sure how to pronounce that). And in light of recent creative obstacles (see yesterday) I figured tonight was as good a night as any to play your little reindeer games.

First there was my friend, Lydia from On The Verge, who challenged me to share six secrets about myself.

1. I’m a disorganized slob. Seriously, housekeeping is not my forte. Neither is remembering when the bills are due, rsvp-ing to party invites, or sending thank you notes.

2. I’m a closet scab picker. I do it when I’m on edge, it drives my husband crazy.

3. I have zero rhythm. I cannot dance, not even a little.

4. I was an underage drinker because I lacked the proper adult supervision. However I no longer partake of the alcoholic beverages. They make me sleepy and I’m sleepy enough on a regular basis as it is.

5. I also used to smoke cigarettes, which I no longer do, although sometimes I wish I still did, it would keep me from picking at my scabs.

6. I am not that interesting.

Still with me.

Next I got thrown this little number by both Ohana Mama and Savvy Suzie . Both of whom insist I should tell you seven random things about myself, according to this image. If it’s on a JPEG, then it’s practically law.

1. I have smelly feet. You asked. Well…they asked.

2. I do not eat liver. I eat practically anything, I love food, but I tend to veer away from the internal organs. Call me crazy.

3.  I hate talking to customer service representatives over the phone. I also hate making doctor’s appointments and leaving voice messages for people who I’m not friendly with. It gives me anxiety.

4. The last time I saw my father at a local Target, he did not recognize me…because he’s stupid. Before that, I hadn’t talked to him in five years. Before those five years, it had been 10. Yeah, he sucks.

5. I failed three out of four classes my first semester of college in 1993. Not because I was stupid, but because I was lazy.

6. Besides reality shows, horror movies are one of my biggest guilty pleasures. I hate watching them alone and my husband refuses to watch them with me. He’s more of a western kind of guy.

Last but not least the hilarious Kia from Good Enough Mama invited me to participate in this scattergories meme. The rules are to use the first letter of my name to answer the following questions. Let’s go with Mrs. Bear shall we…

1. What is your name?  Mrs. Bear
2. A 4 Letter Word: Maim
3. A Boys’ Name: Maury (he could be a talk show host)
4. A Girls’ Name: Mystique (she could be a stripper)
5. An Occupation: Marauder
6. A Color: Magenta
7. Something you men (shouldn’t) wear: Moccasins
8. A Beverage: Milk (it does do a  body good, unless your lactose intolerant)
9. A Food Group : Melons (not those kinds, get your mind out of the gutter)
10. Something found in the bathroom: Make-up (I don’t use it, but it’s there.)
11. A place: Mercury (you can’t really go there, but it exists)
12. A Reason for being late: Mopping (it’s happened, particularly after a bout of projectile vomiting. You know what I’m talking about.)
13. Something you shout: Move! (As in MOOOOVE your car out of the fast lane so us raging road warriors can get where we need to go.)
14. Make up a word and give its definition: Millaboutismia: A disorder that affects most of the kids in my house, and prevents them from seeing any task to its conclusion because they are too busy walking around in circles and staring at the walls.

I’m not going to specifically call anyone out, feel free to join the fun, I’m leaving it an open invite because I’m feeling generous. I’d like to tag the whole world if I could, then I’d buy them a Coke, then I’d go to bed because so many people all together at once make me want to curl in to the fetal position. Nuff said.

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