Feb 19 2009
I Just Held a Newborn
Today my neighbor came by with her brand spanking new baby.
She also let me hold her brand spanking new baby. For a good ten minutes.
I think new babies are like new cars, when someone you know gets one, you’re immediately overcome with the urge to follow suit and snag one of your own regardless of your financial situation. I mean they smell soooo good…both cars and babies.
So here I was holding this tiny, squishy, sweet faced, sleeping baby and it’s like there was a short circuit in my brain. Colic, middle of the night feedings, projectile vomiting, and ear infection memories were all filed in my mental trashcan. All I could do was suck in the smell of new baby (because I can finally breathe through my nostrils thanks my effective antibiotics prescription) and swoon and see this in my head…
This was my youngest mere days after we got him home from the hospital. My neighbor, who’s a great photographer, was nice enough to shoot these for me since our hospital picture taker ditched work early on the day of our departure. This sweet little newborn has turned in to this…
Which, don’t get me wrong, is always hugely entertaining and delicious in its own right, but…well, his feet will never be this small again…
Please, folks, convince me I don’t need a fifth baby. For sure, we can’t afford one. Nor can we fit another kid in our tiny shoebox house. But I need your help to clear the scramble that newborn left in my brain, that hardwired signal he triggered that tells me I need to reproduce yet again.
Tell me how awful new babies are. How unbearable those nine months of pregnancy can be. How hard it is to give up sleep again. How gross baby barf smells when you unknowingly walk out of the house with it on your shirt.
It will help, trust me.
Would it be really evil to say you can have all the fun of new baby without the pregnancy woes??? You know…you could always adopt
I know, I know. I need to give it a rest.
But not sure I can help ya. That’s an awfully cute baby.
I know what you’re saying. They are incredibly sweet.
Here’s some mental help. Imagine that you’ve plucked that sweet child out of its bed in the middle of the night and taken it in bed with you. Imagine that it’s still sucking up huge breaths from crying, so you’ve tucked it between the covers and your stomach, and it’s laying on it’s stomach near your heart. You hope to comfort it and still snooze a little.
Imagine that sweet child taking a deep breath and puking all over you, and the bed, and your sleeping husband.
I hope this helps. It happened to me and it helped to remember it.
Marilynne
http://womenoverfifty.Today.com
Just for the record, I’ve come to my senses. I’ve had one of those nights where every ounce of my patience has been tested and I’ve wanted briefly to run screaming from my house…where four children are already running around screaming. Ugh. Throw a newborn in to the mix? Heck to the nah. Maybe my sister will get knocked up and I can borrow hers for a few hours at a time…Get crackin’ scary mime.
Thanks to all for being the voice of reason. Except for you oldwestmom, you were not helping, after my baby smelling intoxication I would’ve taken any newborn, not just one I made myself.
Ha! I enjoy playing devil’s advocate. I’m a really bad diet buddy. I’m usually the one enabling my friends to eat the giant piece of chocolate cake.